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Your friend is upset that you’re missing the event, and lets their frustrations be known:“You seriously can’t come to my party? ”Later on, after they’ve cooled down, your friend comes and apologizes for their harsh reaction.
They may not like it, but they understand why you can’t come.
However, this may not be the smart move — doing so only encourages the tantrum-thrower to repeat this behavior whenever they aren’t happy with us.
The news is that one psychoanalyst has isolated a much better strategy that will stop an adult temper tantrum in its tracks — so the next time your spouse, friend, or relative has an outburst, you’ll be ready.
This is is a mistake — the more emotional you are, the more you’re engaging with the tantrum-thrower. “If the person having a tantrum is on drugs, alcohol, etc.
“Being able to calm and console yourself is a central part of being a resilient adult, yet many people are unable to do it,” she says.
The people who have learned how to be resilient or self-console, are prone to throw adult tantrums and react the way we expect a child to. When people around us throw tantrums, the obvious answer seems to be that you should just cut those adult-babies out of your life. Unfortunately, we can’t always cut ties and walk away. Satow has developed a 5-step strategy for handling these emotional outbursts and fostering healthier relationships:“The first rule in responding to an adult temper tantrum is that you have to stay calm and not get engaged in it,” Dr. When someone else is crying, screaming or torturing you with silence, the temptation to get emotional is high.
In the latter situation, your friend didn’t just have a slight overreaction — they had a temper tantrum.
They weren’t able to deal with the disappointment of not getting their way as well as being let down, so they chose to passive-aggressively punish you as a way to sate their anger.