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Use one condom and lubricant every time you have vaginal, oral, or anal sex, including during foreplay, until you know your partner’s sexual history, STI status, and are in a sexually exclusive relationship.
Do not use Vaseline or mineral oil with condoms because it destroys the condom lining. Elizabeth, an information technology manager at a local government agency, is an athletic woman, efficient in her movements. So begins the fifth session of Our Whole Lives (OWL): Sexuality Education for Adults, at the First Unitarian Church of Austin. "It was just nice to be touched at all," says Judith.Finally, Eugene picks up a pen and writes down "first time had sex." The other men slowly begin to join in. Judith says the exercise made her realize that one huge thing she can't control about her sexuality is her fading looks. The women return her you're-out-of-your-mind look, so she explains: "When I was young, I'd see these older women and they just seemed as if they had confidence and were wise—and more comfortable in their skin. "I didn't get any mileage out of being cute when I was young.Together they manage to write: "accidentally masturbated," "masturbated," "first time had sex," "prostate," and "Viagra." Tuttle calls time and invites the students to look at the timelines. "Like, I'm still looking at 40-year-old men," Judith says, "but they're not looking back." A few of the other women agree. I'm much more comfortable in my skin today than I was at 30, 25, 20, and definitely 15." "How? Maybe that's the positive side of not being cute or flirty at 20—when you don't get that attention at 45, you haven't lost anything." A little later, Judith admits that she can think of a few good things that result from getting older.Many older adults are remaining or becoming sexually active.This is because of better health among older adults, longer lifespans, more open attitudes toward sexuality, internet dating, and the availability of medications like Viagra and estrogen products.Sex can still be satisfying but will be different from younger years, and might need to be adapted for current age, disability, illness, or surgery-induced body changes.Older adults are more vulnerable to sexually transmitted infections (STIs) than younger adults. Know your partner’s sexual background before having oral, vaginal, or anal sex. Talk about your sexual histories, any past STIs, results of STI testing, and whether either of you has ever injected illegal drugs.Put the condom on after the penis is erect, leaving a 1/2 inch space at the tip. Your healthcare provider can offer additional advice about protecting yourself from STIs and when sex is safe with certain medical conditions such as after a heart attack.Hold the condom at the base (open end) as you remove it. Your provider can also recommend treatments for common sexual problems such as vaginal dryness and erectile dysfunction (difficulty getting an erection, also known as ED).