No dating just sex
You've been together for years, raised kids and pets. As months drift into years, you realize: You're in a sexless marriage.Most married couples don't really know what to expect of a long-term relationship, says Diane Solee, MSW, a former marriage counselor who is the founder and director of "Our parents or grandparents may have lived that way, but we don't anymore." With therapy and the right medication, the irritable anxiousness and depression can disappear.If your partner won't go to counseling, then you need to go alone, she says.But AARP studies show that 65% remain sexually active." Put aside the romanticized, silver-screen notions of sex, Foley says."The majority of people your age are having good-enough sex."With aging comes an increase in depression and irritability.Women complain to me -- I was ready to try these things, but I couldn't get my partner to do it." Often, the irritability and crankiness is actually masking anxiety and depression.
You may have gotten into a rut." There's more at stake than simply boredom.
a renewal of what this marriage is supposed to be." First step: Be realistic.
If you're looking for the swept-off-your feet sex of those first few years, dream on. Three years later, you'll have the same sizzle-less marriage you have right now.
If your partner is downright snarly about it, then you've got to stand your ground.
"This isn't the kind of thing in this day and age that people live with," she says.